Books.org participates in affiliate programs including Bookshop.org and the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. We may earn a commission from qualifying purchases made through links on this page, at no additional cost to you.
Overview
All her adult life, Alexandra Soiseth wanted a husband, children, a dog, and a cat. But at thirty-nine, with no husband on the horizon, she takes matters into her own hands. With humor and heart, Soiseth shares the often gut-wrenching reality she faces in having a baby on her own-a mother and father who disapprove, friends who think she's crazy, and a society that thinks she's selfish. Choosing You is a testament to the fact that with a little guts, a lot of love, and the internet, almost anything is possible.Synopsis
All her adult life, Alexandra Soiseth has wanted a husband, children, dogs and cats—a busy, loving, home. But at thirty-nine, with no husband on the horizon, she decides to take matters into her own hands.
She googles for sperm.
Choosing You is Alexandra's memoir. With humor and heart, she shares the often gut-wrenching reality she faces in having a baby on her own—a mother and father who disapprove, friends who think she's crazy, a society that thinks she's selfish. But it is her struggle with weight and self image, possible infertility, and the terror of bringing a child into this world without a father that almost stops her from getting what she wants most—a family.
Alexandra's story shows us all that with a little guts, a lot of love, and the internet, almost anything is possible.
Kirkus Reviews
Spotty though often lively memoir of the author's decision to become a single mother. In March 2000, 35-year-old Soiseth (Creative Writing/Sarah Lawrence Coll.) was just finishing grad school. "Fat, feeling like crap," she was "in no place to go forth and get what I really want: a family of my own." Her weight seemed to be a barrier to this goal, so she lost more than 100 pounds. Getting her life in order seemed the next obvious step, so she learned how to keep her house tidy and her bills paid. Then all she had to do was meet Mr. Right, but after some determined Internet dating and a breakup with someone who wasn't ready for kids, she decided at 39 that waiting to find the perfect man might keep her waiting too long. Back to the Internet she went, this time to find the perfect sperm donor. "Once I buy this sperm, that's it. I'm letting go, FOREVER, of the dream I had for my life," writes the author. "I need to cry a little about my lost dream. I need to mourn the death of romance." She eventually settled on a blond, skinny, six-foot-tall Dane, but there was little time for mourning after his sperm arrived packed in dry ice; she became pregnant with the first implantation attempt. The author does not gloss over her pregnancy's negative aspects: nausea, breast tenderness and a diagnosis of pre-eclampsia that led to induced labor. After a few days of post-birth euphoria, being a single parent proved no picnic. Sleeplessness, blocked milk ducts, nighttime feedings and sky-high day-care rates were among the trials Soiseth experienced, not to mention the difficulty of explaining to little daughter Kaj why she had no daddy. While the author often strays into self-pity and stays there too long,there is genuine sweetness in her search to understand both her own history and her need to parent. Often charming, occasionally irritating, eventually gratifying.