Humor, Entertainment Biography, Women's Biography, Comedy, Women's Biography

I Hate Everyone...Starting with Me

Name: I Hate Everyone...Starting with Me
Author: Joan Rivers
ISBN: 9780425255896

by Joan Rivers

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Overview

NOW WITH NEW MATERIAL FOR THE PAPERBACK EDITION

“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.” —Elizabeth Barrett Browning, 1850

“How do I hate thee? How much time do you have?” —Joan Rivers, today, about two-ish

Joan Rivers, comedienne, actress, jewelry monger, and an award-winning international star (she can sneer in eight different languages) lives by the golden rule: Do unto others before they do unto you—and for God’s sakes, do it funny! Her career in comedy may have begun with self-loathing, but, after looking at the decrepitude around her, she figured, “Why stop here when there are so many other things to hate?” With all of her experiences, Joan has looked down at, turned away from, and thrown up over a lot of hateful things, deplorable places, and despicable people. Thank God she took notes.

Here—uncensored and uninhibited—Joan says exactly what’s on her mind…And HER mind is a terrible thing to waste. She proudly kicks the crap out of ugly children, dating rituals, funerals, and lousy restaurants. She nails First Ladies, closet cases, and hypocrites to the wall. She shows no mercy towards doctors and feminists, and even goes after Anne Frank and Stephen Hawking. Joan lets everyone—including herself—have it in this one hundred percent honest and unabashedly hilarious love letter to the hater in all of us.

This is absolute Joan Rivers. You gotta love her. Even if she hates you.

Includes new material!

About the Author, Joan Rivers

Comedienne, Emmy Award–winning TV host, Tony-nominated actress and CEO, JOAN RIVERS is an icon of American culture. She is a bestselling author, Celebrity Apprentice winner, writer, producer, director, and savvy businesswoman who has overcome great odds to reinvent herself time and time again. Joan hosts E! Network’s popular series Fashion Police, and stars with her daughter, Melissa, in their own weekly reality show, Joan and Melissa: Joan Knows Best? on WEtv Network. Her critically acclaimed documentary, Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work premiered in theaters nationwide and is available on DVD. Rivers also performs her trademark stand-up comedy act in front of sold-out audiences in the U.S. and abroad. Amongst all of her success, Joan’s most joyous triumph is being a mother and grandmother. She resides in New York and Los Angeles with her three rescue dogs.

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Editorials

From Barnes & Noble

"How do I hate thee? How much time do you have?" But Joan Rivers doesn't just hate you and me and Octomom and the Kardashians; she also hates herself: "Before we make love, my husband takes a painkiller." In I Hate Everyone... Starting with Myself, this resilient party-pooper indulges her intense displeasure with everything. (Who else among us admits that she hates children who fall down wells?) Finally, comeuppance for Mickey Rooney and women who breastfeed in public. Sinfully entertaining; now in trade paperback and NOOK Book. (P.S. The paperback contains all new, all hilarious material.)

Publishers Weekly

Irreverent comedienne Rivers (Men Are Stupid...And They Like Big Boobs: A Woman's Guide to Beauty Through Plastic Surgery) is back with this sometimes funny and frequently offensive treatise on everything she hates, and as the title promises, she spares nothing and no one-not even herself. Victims of her vitriol include "women who think that giving birth is some unique achievement," "ugly children," Christian Bale (though she insists it's "nothing personal"), Annie Oakley, nudists, men without manners, and plenty others. She even takes on interfaith marriages, misleading state superlatives ("For example, New Jersey is nicknamed 'The Garden State.' Really? Have you ever smelled New Jersey?"), the Boy Scouts of America, and "people who complain that 'Joan says "fuck" too much.'" Taken in very, very small doses, Rivers's aggressively acerbic wit can be hilarious, but the unbridled cynicism will likely wear on anyone who isn't Joan Rivers. Photos.
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Kirkus Reviews

A humorous tirade on nearly everything and everyone. Rivers (Men Are Stupid…And They Like Big Boobs, 2008, etc.) is back with an entertaining rant on how she hates nearly everything and everyone, especially herself. Nothing is sacred to Rivers as she delivers one-liners on the whole shebang of human existence. From birthing a child, having sex, getting married, growing old and dying, to living in cities, eating in restaurants and travelling to foreign lands, the author gives readers her unusual perspective on each scenario. On manners: "I hate people who blow their nose at the dinner table and then look in their hankie. What do they think they're going to find?" On dating younger men: "I'll never be a cougar. I don't like younger men. I don't ever want to wake up in the morning and wonder, Is this my date or did I give birth last night?" On cities: "I hate San Francisco because I not only left my heart there but my hairdresser." Show business, nature, even the slogans each state uses to promote itself…none are immune to Rivers' often-caustic jesting. Relentless in her pursuit, the author is sure to offend everyone at some point in this book, regardless of the comedic intent. The only thing missing is the sound of a drum roll and cymbals to feel as though one is sitting in a nightclub watching a live comedy marathon. The book is best read in small, random batches, with a large martini in hand. A raucous, biting look at life.