Lies at the Altar: The Truth About Great Marriages

For those who are about to walk down the aisle, for those who are already married, and for those contemplating a deeper commitment, Dr. Robin Smith's Lies at the Altar addresses the unspoken needs, unasked questions, outrageous expectations, and hidden agendas that damage relationships. By examining traditional, nondenominational wedding vows, Dr. Robin shows how to use them to build a happy, healthy, satisfying, and long-lasting marriage -- the kind of marriage many of us have never even imagined.

With moving stories and personal anecdotes, Dr. Robin reveals why it's vital to keep one's eyes wide open in a marriage; how to write rules to live by; and why it's never too late to rewrite wedding vows. Especially useful are her 276 Questions to Ask Before You Marry, which will open new lines of communication and help couples to create their own Truth -- the secret ingredient to any great marriage.

Dr. Robin Smith advises couples on how to take the wedding vows that were made in earnest and in innocence, to a level where they can be used to build a happy, healthy, satisfying and long-lasting marriage. Lies at the Altar is for couples who are planning marriage, are newly married, or who have been married for years.

In Lies at the Altar: The Truth About Great Marriages, Dr. Robin Smith addresses the unspoken needs, unasked questions, outrageous expectations, and hidden agendas that often linger beneath the surface of the wedding vows and appear later to cause power struggles, suffering, and feelings of hopelessness in marriages.

Dr. Smith discusses why it's important to have one's "eyes wide open" in a marriage; how to write true vows to live by; and why it's never too late to rewrite your vows. She illustrates her advice with detailed stories from her own life, as well as from couples that she has counseled. And in her inspiring conclusion, she invites couples to light up their lives by acknowledging each other as individuals, each of whom lights a candle, and who lights a third candle which represents "us."

Calling "truth" the secret ingredient of great marriages, Dr. Smith teaches individuals and couples how to find the truth within themselves and their partners, whether they are heading to the altar, suffering in an unhappy marriage, divorced, or simply want to bring more satisfaction and intimacy into their relationship.

Publishers Weekly

Gentle voice notwithstanding, psychologist (and national television personality) Smith pulls no punches and minces no words in her heartfelt caution against the danger in believing "that you don't need what you do need." Truth is the theme here, and Smith guides listeners in how to recognize it, speak it and make it a part of the marriage. Although targeted to women who suppress themselves in order to be in a relationship, men are not left out. Smith's candid examples from her own failed marriage and those of the troubled couples she counsels ably illustrate her points. The first CD lists the top 10 lies about relationships (including "You can learn to live with the things that make you unhappy") together with their corresponding truths ("Suffering is not love"). The second CD explains how couples can make each marriage vow real. The third CD's bonus material is equally valuable: a set of 275 questions (viewable in Adobe reader) to ask before you marry. Smith succeeds admirably in taking the microscope to the myriad actions and words couples automatically do and say, and explaining how questioning them can lead to a more authentic marriage. Simultaneous release with Hyperion hardcover. (May) Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.