Things I've Learned from Women Who've Dumped Me

Relationships end and in nearly all of them, even the most callow among us take something away. This is an audiobook about that something, whether it be major life lessons, like "if you lie, you will get caught," simple truths like, "flowers work," or something wholly unique like, "Watch out for the high strung brother in the military."

This anthology will be comprised of longer and shorter pieces, drawn from an array of impressive celebrities, writers and public figures. All of them will be about that salient something men take away from a failed relationship. This is not a touchy-feely or self-help audiobook. This is an audiobook packed with smart, funny and insightful stories from men you probably thought never got dumped, or if they did, would never admit it.

Publishers Weekly

Karlin, coauthor of Jon Stewart's America, establishes that if there is one thing men have in common, it is their lack of understanding and the misguided information they have acquired about women. With miniessays from famous comedians and writers, including Nick Hornby, Stephen Colbert and Bruce Jay Friedman, this book is organized into short chapters of truth, testimonies and realizations about the women that got away and, sadly, the women that they never had to begin with. Some of the essays offer advice, such as Bob Odenkirk's bitter nine-year plan, where he discusses why nine years is the perfect amount of time to be in a bad relationship (by year nine "you [had] tried everything, including depression and deep boredom"). Some of the men's experiences proved to be valuable lessons such as Dan Savage's essay "I Am a Gay Man," where he finds that women can be detestable, and learns that he doesn't have to "fake being straight or join the priesthood" and can instead just be a gay man; or Patton Oswalt's realization that his crazy, stripper ex-girlfriend helped him appreciate his wife. Whether the men pathetically recall their failed dating attempts or are celebrating their record number of "dumps" as learned experiences, these witty, comical approaches to being dumped are sure to entertain anyone who has entered the world of dating. (Feb.)

Ben Karlin was the executive producer of The Daily Show and the co-creator and executive producer of The Colbert Report. He is currently an independent producer for HBO. He lives in New York City with his wife and son.