Bite Me: A Love Story

The city of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, and my manga-haired love monkey stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public.

Whoa. And this is a love story?

Yup. 'Cept there's no whining. But there is everybody's favorite undead couple, Tommy and Jody, who've just escaped from imprisonment in a bronze statue. And now that they're out they've joined forces with Abby, her boyfriend Steve, the frozen-turkey-bowling Safeway crew, the Emperor of San Francisco and his trusty dogs Lazarus and Bummer, gay Goth guy Jared, and SF's finest Cavuto and Rivera to hunt big cat and save the city. Really.

Christopher Moore is a very sick man, in the very best sense of that word.
Carl Hiassen

The undead rise again in Bite Me, the third book in New York Times bestselling author Christopher Moore s wonderfully twisted vampire saga. Joining his farcical gems Bloodsucking Fiends and You Suck, Moore s latest in continuing story of young, urban, nosferatu style love, is no Twilight but rather a tsunami of the irresistible outrageousness that has earned him the appellation, Stephen King with a whoopee cushion and a double-espresso imagination from the Atlanta Journal-Constitution and inspired Denver s Rocky Mountain News to declare him, the 21st century s best satirist.

Publishers Weekly

A vampire cat is stalking San Francisco in Moore’s serviceable latest comic horror adventure (after You Suck), and the only humans who can take him down are goth girl Abby Normal and her brainiac boyfriend, Stephen “Foo Dog” Wong. They, in turn, call upon Abby’s masters, vampiric lovers Jody and Tommy, who were on the verge of breaking up until Abby decided to bronze them posed as Rodin’s The Kiss. Also in pursuit of the vampire cat and his minions are the Animals, the night stock crew at the Marina Safeway who hunt vampires in their spare time; a lunatic homeless man who calls himself the “Emperor of San Francisco”; a Japanese printmaker who wields a mean sword; and homicide detectives Rivera and Cavuto. Things become even more complicated with the arrival of three ancient vampires intent on getting some payback. The narrative could use trimming, and much of the humor seems recycled from Moore’s previous vampire tomes, though this won’t matter to the legions of fans who crave Moore’s trademark low horror and high camp. (Apr.)

With a body of work that boasts some of the most outlandish plots and outrageous characters ever to make it onto the printed page, Christopher Moore is rapidly making a name for himself as the clown prince of contemporary fiction. It may be a dirty job, but Moore is more than up to the task.