Technical Virgin: How Far Is Too Far?

Huh?! You read that right! The reality is that while you may have decided to save sex for marriage, you may still be having physical encounters--just not going all the way. But being a "technical virgin" isn't just risky--did you know you could still contract an STD or get pregnant?--it can wreak havoc on your emotions and your spirit. Even innocent playing around, like back rubs or tickle fights, could be setting the stage for something more. Hayley DiMarco explains why.

Technical Virgin also answers questions you might be afraid to ask.

-Have I gone too far?
-What is too far?
-If I've messed up, will God forgive me?
-What should I do from now on?

Knowing when to draw the line will help save you the pain "everything but sex" can bring. This book can help you start over with a clean slate if you've already "messed up" and keep your purity intact if you're just starting to get physical with guys. Because purity doesn't have room for compromise.

Hayley DiMarco is the founder of Hungry Planet, the co-author of the phenomenally successful Dateable and the author of Mean Girls and Sexy Girls. Hayley and her husband, Michael, live in Nashville, Tennessee.

Catalog excerpt:

There's an epidemic going on in schools today that has to be addressed. Lots of grown-ups are afraid to talk about it because it just seems too freaky. But I'm not one of them. If we want to get real with ourselves and our God we have to get real about sex. We can't keep on lying to ourselves as if that makes everything okay, because it doesn't. Why are more and more "technical virgins" having more and more sexual encounters? And what does God think about the "technical virgin" anyway? Is he all excited that you found a loophole? Is he happy you are having fun and doing what your body feels like doing?

Let's take a logical look at sex and find out if we are going wrong, where we are going wrong, and how to get back on track.

VOYA

Although targeted to a conservative Christian market, DiMarco's book on technical virginity examines many issues that concern girls. How far is too far? The book stops short of stating where to draw the line, but it underscores that most sexual behavior before marriage, although not precipitating virginity loss, goes way too far. Using Webster's definition of intercourse-physical sexual contact that involves the genitalia of at least one person-DiMarco implodes the "technical virgin" myth by categorizing many encounters, including oral and anal sex, as intercourse. The nine short chapters have enticing titles-"Innocent Flirting or Sexual Foreplay?"-but still pack somber messages. Massages and tickle fights are sex games that are foreplay. Another chapter, "Friends with Benefits" (hooking up for the physical), describes a relationship quagmire that cheapens participants, is akin to prostitution, and emphasizes that oral sex is not just kissing. Other topics-some controversial such as classifying chick flicks and romance novels as female porn-include the loss of emotional virginity and how sexual activity can lead to depression. While scripture verses reinforce moral values, DiMarco's conversational tone and hip language add relevance. And if a girl has gone too far, DiMarco shows how to obtain God's grace through repentance and change. Beautiful black-and-white photographs capturing young couples in tender moments add considerable appeal while sobering sidebars-51 percent of teen marriages end in divorce before the age of twenty-four-reinforce the book's serious message. Purchase for church libraries and public libraries where there is a demand for such material.

Hayley DiMarco writes and creates cutting-edge books that connect with the multitasking mind-set through her company, Hungry Planet. She has written and co-written numerous best-selling books for both teens and adults, including Dateable, Marriable, Sexy Girls, Mean Girls, and Mean Girls All Grown Up. Hayley has also spoken at conferences like Women of Faith. She and her husband, Michael, live in Nashville, Tennessee.