The Taking Tree: A Selfish Parody

We all know the story of the "selfless" tree that gave all she had just to make sure a young boy was "happy".

Snore. This is a different tree. This is a different boy. This is a very different book.

The Taking Tree is not so happy when the boy takes her twigs to pick on his sister, or takes her apples to sell for college (she's an oak tree for goodness sake), or when he cuts off her branches to build a house that he burns for insurance money. And the boy is not sorry at all. Ever. In fact, he's kind of a jerk. And the boy asks for more, and more, and more until the oak tree is so fed up she just can't take it any longer. While another story might end sweetly with an old man sitting on a stump. This one does not.

We all know the story of the "selfless" tree that gave all she had just to make sure a young boy was "happy".

Snore. This is a different tree. This is a different boy. This is a very different book.

The Taking Tree is not so happy when the boy takes her twigs to pick on his sister, or takes her apples to sell for college (she's an oak tree for goodness sake), or when he cuts off her branches to build a house that he burns for insurance money. And the boy is not sorry at all. Ever. In fact, he's kind of a jerk. And the boy asks for more, and more, and more until the oak tree is so fed up she just can't take it any longer. While another story might end sweetly with an old man sitting on a stump. This one does not.

Publishers Weekly

This isn't the first parodic tweak of Shel Silverstein's classic, but it certainly sets a new standard of blithe snarkiness. "The tree was his best friend," writes the nom-de-plumed Travesty of the bratty protagonist. "Which shows what a loser the kid was." The tree, which frankly hates the child (who only gets meaner with age), feels hostage to his selfish and often criminal bidding ("he couldn't get away from him. She was a tree"). Blisteringly sarcastic throughout (when the boy asks for the tree's apples to pay for college, she responds, "I'm an oak tree.... When have you ever seen me grow apples?"), the tree finally embraces the full meaning of "passive-aggressive. "he took the kid's credit cards and ordered a bunch of DVDs she had no intention of watching. And she took the kid's cell phone and called the cops." Debut illustrator Cummins's deadpan cartooning never flags (one visual joke takes aim at the 2008 Republican presidential ticket); her addition of a scraggly and highly expressive mouth to the beleaguered tree's otherwise featureless trunk makes the fear and loathing even funnier. All ages. (Oct.)

Pete Hautman has written many novels for adults, including Doohickey, as well as the teen novels Hole in the Sky, Stone Cold, and Mr. Was, which was nominated for an Edgar Award by the Mystery Writers of America. He divides his time between the Twin Cities of Minnesota and the shores of Lake Pepin in southwestern Wisconsin.

According to Pete, the idea for Sweetblood was born more than twenty years ago:

"I was researching the origins of vampire stories when I discovered two remarkable facts. First, drinking excessive amounts of blood can cause diabetes — bad news for would-be vampires! Second, I learned that diabetes, if left untreated, could produce symptoms that made the victim look and act a lot like the vampires of stories and legends. Coincidence? Perhaps...

"A few years later, I was diagnosed with insulin-dependent diabetes. So far I haven't developed a taste for blood, but you never know...."

Visit Pete on the Web at www.petehautman.com.